Thursday, January 2, 2014

Happy 2014

*Disclaimer: I hope this post doesn't read smugly, as I am not trying to put down the idea of having a Resolution. There are times when a New Years Resolution is the perfect kick-start, and I'm sure I will make plenty of them in the years to come!*

I'm sitting here drinking a mug of Detox Tea and pondering over the saying that I discovered on the little flag that hangs out of the coffee cup during steeping (is there a name for that little flagy thing?):

Real happiness lies in that which never comes nor goes, but simply is.

I won't lie, my first thought was, "Woah, how many of these quotes have I missed reading?"
I have had several cups of this tea during my time here at the Education Center, and have never once noticed the fortune-cookie-like sayings hanging there...

My second and slightly more profound thought was that I was meant to notice this saying today. Reason being that I believe this little quote may partially explain why I have been having such a hard time coming up with a Resolution this year.

There are so many aspects to my life that have lent themselves to my being actually happy; the kind of happy that doesn't come and go, but is just present. In past years, I have been able to pin-point parts of my life which were lacking so I could work on improving my happiness in the year to come. But with an end of year that has been so fulfilling, its hard to make up a goal.

This is not to say that I don't have my days. I get grumpy, I get upset or mad, experience hurt feelings, get disappointed, act selfishly, etc. (as you all have seen and helped me to overcome) but my overall state of being these past several months, and where I am without (and despite) outside circumstances is simply....happy.

Don't get me wrong, this is not to say that I don't have anything to improve upon! It is exactly the opposite!
But, when I'm not happy, or I don't feel myself, I always make a goal during that moment to "fix" whatever it is that is bringing me down. I have already made so many goals for improvement during 2013 that the idea of making a new one just because of the new year doesn't make much sense this time. Every day is an opportunity to make and acheive our goals, every day is an opportunity to better myself from the day before. I believe I must have embraced those concepts because I don't think I've saved any specific goal for "next year."

Which brings me to the fact that I did truly try to think of Resolutions; silly ones, fun ones, Crossfit ones, marriage ones, tough ones, specific and vague ones... and none of them hit a nerve. Every idea I have I am already working towards and don't need a Resolution for, or doesn't seem important enough to require a whole year of focus.

Although I haven't been able to come up with just one set Resolution which is unique to 2014, I do have ongoing goals for myself. I want to continue growing stronger and healthier and quit this back-and-forth healthy/unhealthy eating I've been doing throughout the Holidays in order to get to a solid and unwavering lifestyle of improvement. I want to enjoy the time with my husband as much as I have been for the past few months and put a conscious effort into being the best wife I possibly can be. I want to keep my sanity when he deploys and continue to enjoy my life even though a part of me will be missing. I want to continue traveling as much as possible. I want to keep in touch with my friends and family who live far away, and improve the friendships I have forged here. I want to read and learn and relax and meditate and do all of the things that everybody wants to do in their life.

If I have to narrow it down, it would just be to improve, which is what everybody's goals are meant for, I suppose!

These past few months have been absolutely amazing and enriching. I feel as if Cody and I have gotten into a groove that works for us, and I couldn't be more thankful for every blessed day that I have on this earth. Even the bad days are the kind of days where I think to myself, "When will the bottom fall out? What disaster is about to strike?" because I don't deserve to be having as wonderful of a life as I am having.

So I hope, even if destruction awaits around the next corner about to throw this whole post in my face in an effort to make me eat my words, I can just spend 2014 happy. The kind of happy that never comes nor goes...

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