Monday, July 15, 2013

Hey guys! Let's Talk More About Crossfit!!!

I can almost hear all of you groan in annoyance ... No more Crossfit... please... I beg of you!

First of all, stop feeling sorry for yourself and imagine how my husband feels... I talk about this more than I write about it.

Secondly, you shouldn't be too surprised, considering my first post about Crossfit included the quote, "I have recently realized that I am the annoying paleo-dieting-Crossfitter that everybody hates." Just sayin', there was some foreshadowing. 

Can I share something actually infuriating with you? 
What you will see below is what I am bombarded with when I click on the Health & Fitness section of Pinterest. This is a pretty accurate sample of what every female is exposed to when looking for a way to get fit
Actually, lets take gender out of this post completely: people (men and women) tend to think about working out in terms of what specific body part they want to look better, and how they can make that body part look better while putting forth minimal effort in the least amount of time. And so, we end up with this as our definition of Health & Fitness:

"Loose the pooch"       "The Towel Workout"     "10 Minutes to Tighten and Tone Your Backside"    "5 Minute Booty"       "8 Moves to Perk Your Boobs"      "3 Workouts for Arm Jiggle"    "Pool Workout"      "Get Sleek Sexy Arms"      "Victoria Secret Model Workout"        "10 Hip-Slimming Moves"     "Waist Trimmer"      "How to get 'That Ass'"     "50 Best Exercises for Muffin Top"      "10 Ways to Tone Your Inner Thighs"

Let's not forget the always-present, unrelated to said workout, accompanying picture: 

I'm gonna go ahead and say what we already know, but try to lie to ourselves about. Miss Sexy Sally up there did not get to looking that way from doing "The Towel Workout."

I want to preface the remainder of my post so people don't start bitching about how Crossfitters are elitist, yada yada, bla bla: There are a ton of ways to work out, and different types of working out benefit different people. There is no right or wrong way to workout. I take that back. There most definitely are wrong ways, and we have all watched it happen. But, here is the bottom line: If you are taking steps to a healthier you, be it through walking in your neighborhood, doing pushups and sit-ups before a shower, or partaking in Zumba classes, you deserve a round of applause because your health and fitness is one of the (if not THE) most important aspects of life.

Let me explain one of the top reasons that Crossfit is awesome. All you have to do is come regularly to classes, listen to your coaches, and try as hard as you can. When you take those simple steps, you will get stronger, faster, and more fit. When you start to see results, it will feel like magic.  You don't have to plan anything, you don't have to pick apart your body and decide what area needs the most work. Your responsibility is this: show up, shut up, and "harden the fuck up" < Hey Rob, you have my permission to use that for our next t-shirts if you want, haha :) > 
I used to go to the gym with Cody to lift weights, and I would get annoyed if he was working out a muscle group that I didn't want to work on (I hated shoulder days).  When I wouldn't work up a sweat, or if I didn't work the featured muscle to failure, I left knowing that I wasn't doing enough.  Somedays I just got sick of the same old machines and I would go ride a stationary bike while Cody worked out. I was literally spending hours at the gym, which was definitely better than not going at all, but I know for sure now that I wasn't getting the most out of my time.
I repeat; when you become a member of a Crossfit box, there is no planning if you want to work out your biceps or your abs. There is no staring at yourself in the mirror while you flex the same, isolated muscle over and over again. There are no endless minutes on the elliptical watching the Ellen Degeneres Show and wishing you were somewhere else.
I don't ever go to the box and think, "Gee, I hope we work out our triceps today so I can get rid of my arm jiggle." But just because I don't choose a body part to focus on every day, doesn't mean that I don't see results. Want to know how I know that I am getting fitter, stronger, and maybe even sexier? When I can run a little bit longer without stopping.  When I can lift just a little bit more than the week before. When a movement clicks that I was struggling with.  Then, all of those improvements lead to the superficial ones; like when I try on my pants and they are a little loose in the waist and kind of tight on my butt. Like when I put on t-shirts and they are uncomfortably snug across my shoulders.
How could this be?? I didn't do the "10 Days to Buns of Steel and Sexy Shoulders in Only 5-minutes with No Equipment but my Remote and Couch Workout!"

What I do instead is this: I hang out with amazing people, laugh a lot, cuss sometimes, throw around heavy shit, get motivated, and sweat a gross amount for an hour a day.  It definitely feels like hard work, but it never feels like a waste of time.

In all that time you spend looking for workouts to target a specific body part, or body type, and then for that time you spend reading those workouts and attempting to figure out what the hell they are talking about, you could look up a Crossfit gym near you and set up your first workout. Unlike the girls who attempt the "Towel Workout," you may actually start looking like Miss Sexy Sally (but you won't care, because for the first time, you will feel results that matter more).


  1. AMEN maybe i would even like crossfit .... god only knows none of the other workouts make me look like sexy sally (even if i did them ) :)

  2. Mom, I would be honored, ecstatic, and inspired if you decided to give Crossfit a try :) If you find a coach that cares (and I think that most people involved in Crossfit DO care) you are just as capable as anybody else. If not more so! I know how strong you are and I know that you would be itching to see what you could do if you saw a workout happening. Age, size, fitness, etc. doesn't matter- all you need is heart.