Thailand (Introduction)

Oh, Thailand, I honestly haven't figured out exactly what I think of you…

Thailand is the most contradictory place I've ever been. One moment it is beautiful and the next it is ugly. There are surprises around every corner, and every town/city/beach we went to was different from the one before.

One way I thought to describe this interesting country was by comparing it to other tropical destinations also located in less-developed countries. For example, The Dominican Republic. When visiting the Dominican and staying in an all-inclusive resort you are spoiled from morning to night. Your room is spacious, immaculate, and marble-coated. You are waited on hand and foot, with drinks and food no more than a few steps away at all times. You feel utterly relaxed and taken care of- BUT, there is a feeling of "us" and "them" that doesn't shake. I personally feel guilty for the luxury I am living in and can only guess about how the workers of the resort and their families actually live day-to-day. The real way of life there is something carefully concealed and tucked away from the eyes of the resort guests.
Then there is Thailand. Imagine the same beautiful beaches of the Dominican (more beautiful in most cases) but take down that veil between the resort workers and the resort-goers. In fact, if we are talking about our trip specifically, you can just remove the resort completely and replace it with any level of hotel you'd like; from skeezy motel to beautiful chalet. There is something distinctly "other" about every facet of this destination.

My brother explained the cities like college campuses where the students are allowed to run everything top to bottom- including plumbing and electricity.  Everything functions fine, but nothing is exactly the way you feel it should be. The toilets take some figuring out (there was a "bum gun" or a tub of water with scoop, and no toilet paper could be flushed), as well as the showers (which are usually heated by a little electronic box which may or may not actually create hot water), and I was constantly a bit concerned that electrocution wasn't unlikely (all of their wiring occurs outside and with no casing, it all just kind of hangs from poles). 

If I told you I loved it, I would be lying. But I don't want you to think I hated it, either. Because I didn't hate it, not even close! What I can say with complete certainty is that I am incredibly grateful to be home, and to have a home like the one I have.

I could try all day, but I would never really be able to say what it is like to be in Thailand. Especially after a hurried two week romp of about six beaches/towns/cities. So what I will do is take some time over the next few days to write down an itinerary of what we did, and let you make up your own mind, instead…

Not So Negative Nancy

I don't have too much to update you on today, although I do want to follow up on my previous post...

     Primarily the fact that the "low" from last week's post only lingered for a day. Thanks to my awesome community and my amazing coach, I had the opportunity to stop feeling mopey and start feeling strong again lickity split!
    
    After tons of encouragement from several people, including serious understanding from several of my Crossfit ladies, I came in to my Wednesday WOD ready to compete against myself- not in time, but in the stength and quality of my performance.

I'm not sure if Rob had read my previous post or not, but either way, he did just what I needed him to do in order to help me feel strong again. I could leave it at that, but you all know I just can't, so here comes story-time:
One part of our three-part workout was 21 kettlebell swings at 3/4 bodyweight. Thinking about this throughout the day, I put together that I would have to swing about 42kg in order to do the workout as prescribed; and considering we were supposed to use two kettlebells if necessary to total the correct weight, I would have to use two 20kg kettlebells for this workout. I've never used anything heavier than two 12's.
When the time came to pick out our kettlebells, Rob told me to grab a 32 kg kettlebell. For those of you who don't want to calculate in your noggin, that is 70.5 lbs. To swing between my legs and up into the air. Twenty-one times. For three rounds. Also, this was the same kettlebell that my stronger, heavier, and faster husband was grabbing.
I waited a second to see if he was joking, and he didn't seem to be, so I went to pick one up. I could barely lift it.
I turned back around to get his attention; "Hey Rob, really?"
He smirked, "Yes really."
"You aren't messing with me?"
"No. Use a 32."
So I wobbled out onto the floor with my 32, convinced that if I could barely carry it, there was no way I could swing it. But the disappointment of failing to push myself was still in my mind, and I was determined to at least try. Rob told me not to worry about the height of the swing; if I could only get it to my waist it was fine (as long as my form was okay and I wasn't hurting myself, of course).
I bent down, wrapped my palm and fingers around the handle, loaded my hamstrings, pivoted the kettlebell, and pulled back with all my might-  and I swung that beast!
Granted, throughout the workout there was a lot of advice given that wasn't heeded because once that monster was moving through the air there wasn't much adjustment I could make. If it was moving, my butt was tight, my back wasn't hurting, I was breathing, and I wasn't falling over, life was good!

I ended that night feeling wonderful- just as I usually do when I go to Crossfit Ansbach and work out with my friends. As the icing on the cake, Rob threw a few more compliments my way before I left, (making me think that he probably did read my blog and wanted to give me a pick-me-up); but, although his words were definitely appreciated, he had already done the perfect job of ridding me from my negativity, just by being the kind of coach that he is (one who knows what you are capable of even when you don't, and pushes you to be better).

Basically, If any of you are still wondering why I care so much about this crazy "cult" of fitness...

If you take away the people and the bonds, the muscles and endorphins, the other addicting and wonderful aspects of this "trend" ...  you will see that empowerment is the answer.

In a world filled to the brim with the promotion of self-doubt, to continuously learn the never-ending capacity of my mind, my body, and MYSELF is a priceless treasure.

 These are gifts which absolutely deserve appreciation and love.

Thanks again and again Crossfit Ansbach! See you tonight!

The Day that Good Wasn't Good Enough (Just another unexpected Crossfit first....)

Have you ever been simultaneously proud and disappointed at the same time?

 

Yea, me neither.....Until last night....

This is the deal. Last night's workout was a killer before I even got there. Just reading it beforehand on the blog, I knew it was bound to be an absolute soul-crusher. (I do mean this as a compliment, by the way). I spent the whole day dreading the experience; mainly because the workout contained four 200-meter sprints IF you weren't able to get to one of the seven rowers (considering the evening classes are packed, it was by no means certain that I could get to one).

I still don't like running. It has gotten easier, and a warmup or cooldown jog is doable and sometimes enjoyable. Plus, I would rather sprint than do a long-distance run on any day of the week (by long-distance I'm talking anything over 800-meters... even if you told me to jog two-miles I would probably cry. Sad, I know). BUT, if you haven't ever tried to do more than one 200-meter sprint, just believe me when I say that 200-meter sprints are beyond tough. One 200-meter sprint is exhausting, yet invigorating; multiple sprints leave me barely able to move my legs, while trying to give myself a mental pep-talk and wondering if I am about to throw up or poop my pants. I don't know if this is a normal reaction or not, but it has been my personal experience so far.

The workout started with 10 unbroken cleans using any piece(s) of equipment in the box, or viper presses with a log. I chose the viper press. (click here to see a demo) I don't know why, but I actually find the movement fun, and when faced with an option to not do cleans, I will take it. For some reason, despite being the easiest movement for most people, I still haven't quite perfected cleans. This is on the goal list...
The next step of the workout was a 40 second row sprint IF you could get to the rower; if not, you had to sprint 200 meters. It may have been unfair/petty of me, but you best believe I set my log up right next to that set of rowers and made sure the men around me knew that I would fight dirty to end up on one. Luckily, Matt, who stood behind me, wanted to run (what!?) so that was at least one competitor out of the way.
The third part of the workout was 15 unbroken front squats; again, using any "toy" in the box. I chose to do goblet squats with one kettlebell. Knowing that I can do about 20 reps straight with 45 kilograms during back squats, that back squats are generally done with more weight than front squats, and that I would have to do 60 reps by the end of the workout, I stuck with a 16kg kettlebell.
Oh yea, and if you broke a set, you had to start over at the beginning of the set. Just for an added suck-cherry on top of the ass-kicking sundae! (again, I say this with total love and respect)
You repeated these three steps for four rounds, with sixty much-needed seconds of rest between each round.

When the timer started, I hit those viper presses like a banshee! I was the first one to hop onto a rower HALLELUJAH and hauled ass because if I didn't keep up I thought I wouldn't make it to the rower on the next round. Again, my main motivator for moving as fast as humanly possible was the prospect of having to sprint 200 meters.

Lo and behold, I finished the whole workout in 12 minutes and 45 seconds; a fairly quick time (from what I could tell). I immediately felt proud that I had finished faster than I expected (and faster than Cody's time from earlier in the day ;) ) and I was so incredibly relieved to be done working out. I couldn't gulp in air fast enough, my legs were numb, and my whole body was exhuasted; I couldn't really make out the clock across the room because my vision was blurring when I tried to look too far in the distance.

I know that I pushed myself to the limit as far as intensity goes. I couldn't have added weight to my viper press because I almost hit muscle failure on my last two reps. I rowed as hard as I possibly could, and made it to the rower every single time. Part of me wanted to do a little dance and call Cody to brag a little bit!

But when Rob came over to tell me I did a good job and ask if I felt strong.... the answer was no. I didn't want to say it, because I didn't want to sound negative or like I was begging for reinforcement, but looking around the room, I didn't feel strong at all.
So I just said, "my vision is blurry," which I guess was my exhausted and brain-dead way of saying, "well, I'm really worn out and pushed myself, if thats what you're asking."

The only reason I can figure out for being disappointed when I should feel good is that I have such an overwhelming desire to do better and be better when it comes to Crossfit.
and I'm not sure if this is a good or a bad thing....

Usually, when I finish among the first in the class or know I performed well during a workout, I feel super proud of myself. Last night, it wasn't enough to do the best that I could. I want to be better than I currently am. I may have "beaten" some women in the class time-wise, but there is no comparison, because those women were doing front squats with at least 30 kg!
I shouldn't, and usually don't, compare myself to other people, but I am so frustrated that my legs can't keep up with my desire to get stronger! I wonder if I have been cheating myself during workouts even though I don't mean to. Maybe I would feel better about it if I would have sucked it up and done the sprints instead of letting my intimidation rule me; even though I hate sprints, doing them would probably be better for me than sticking in my comfort zone.

Intellectually, I know that I can't be good at every movement. Lord knows that I am usually closer to last place than first. And the cool part of Crossfit is that it incorporates so many aspects of fitness, that even the top competitors have workouts they don't do well during.
I know that I am leaps and bounds above where I was when I first started, and this in itself should be encouragement and a source of pride. and it usually is!
I know that I should be proud of what I excel at; those things that Rob points out to me all the time, and the movements that I can tell are truly improving each week...

But I feel disappointed.

So here is my first ever somewhat negative Crossfit post.... not because of Crossfit, but because of me being a negative-nancy. Which makes me feel even worse. Am I hormonal or something? Gross.

 I'm just going to spend all day looking at Crossfit motivation stuff on the internet and then come kick some ass at the box tonight. So there.

Happy 2014

*Disclaimer: I hope this post doesn't read smugly, as I am not trying to put down the idea of having a Resolution. There are times when a New Years Resolution is the perfect kick-start, and I'm sure I will make plenty of them in the years to come!*

I'm sitting here drinking a mug of Detox Tea and pondering over the saying that I discovered on the little flag that hangs out of the coffee cup during steeping (is there a name for that little flagy thing?):

Real happiness lies in that which never comes nor goes, but simply is.

I won't lie, my first thought was, "Woah, how many of these quotes have I missed reading?"
I have had several cups of this tea during my time here at the Education Center, and have never once noticed the fortune-cookie-like sayings hanging there...

My second and slightly more profound thought was that I was meant to notice this saying today. Reason being that I believe this little quote may partially explain why I have been having such a hard time coming up with a Resolution this year.

There are so many aspects to my life that have lent themselves to my being actually happy; the kind of happy that doesn't come and go, but is just present. In past years, I have been able to pin-point parts of my life which were lacking so I could work on improving my happiness in the year to come. But with an end of year that has been so fulfilling, its hard to make up a goal.

This is not to say that I don't have my days. I get grumpy, I get upset or mad, experience hurt feelings, get disappointed, act selfishly, etc. (as you all have seen and helped me to overcome) but my overall state of being these past several months, and where I am without (and despite) outside circumstances is simply....happy.

Don't get me wrong, this is not to say that I don't have anything to improve upon! It is exactly the opposite!

 

 

But, when I'm not happy, or I don't feel myself, I always make a goal during that moment to "fix" whatever it is that is bringing me down. I have already made so many goals for improvement during 2013 that the idea of making a new one just because of the new year doesn't make much sense this time. Every day is an opportunity to make and acheive our goals, every day is an opportunity to better myself from the day before. I believe I must have embraced those concepts because I don't think I've saved any specific goal for "next year."

Which brings me to the fact that I did truly try to think of Resolutions; silly ones, fun ones, Crossfit ones, marriage ones, tough ones, specific and vague ones... and none of them hit a nerve. Every idea I have I am already working towards and don't need a Resolution for, or doesn't seem important enough to require a whole year of focus.

Although I haven't been able to come up with just one set Resolution which is unique to 2014, I do have ongoing goals for myself. I want to continue growing stronger and healthier and quit this back-and-forth healthy/unhealthy eating I've been doing throughout the Holidays in order to get to a solid and unwavering lifestyle of improvement. I want to enjoy the time with my husband as much as I have been for the past few months and put a conscious effort into being the best wife I possibly can be. I want to keep my sanity when he deploys and continue to enjoy my life even though a part of me will be missing. I want to continue traveling as much as possible. I want to keep in touch with my friends and family who live far away, and improve the friendships I have forged here. I want to read and learn and relax and meditate and do all of the things that everybody wants to do in their life.

If I have to narrow it down, it would just be to improve, which is what everybody's goals are meant for, I suppose!

These past few months have been absolutely amazing and enriching. I feel as if Cody and I have gotten into a groove that works for us, and I couldn't be more thankful for every blessed day that I have on this earth. Even the bad days are the kind of days where I think to myself, "When will the bottom fall out? What disaster is about to strike?" because I don't deserve to be having as wonderful of a life as I am having.

So I hope, even if destruction awaits around the next corner about to throw this whole post in my face in an effort to make me eat my words, I can just spend 2014 happy. The kind of happy that never comes nor goes...

The *Fabulous* King and More...

First of all: MERRY CHRISTMAS! HAPPY CHANUKAH! HAPPY NEW YEAR! ETC!

 

For those of you who don't know, Cody's family has been here for a few weeks spending the Holidays with us- and we just enjoyed a delicious holiday feast yesterday that I think I will be working off for a couple months!

Since they arrived, we have gone on several adventures in the surrounding areas, but the biggest one was our trip down to the Bavarian Alps this past weekend.

Stacy, Lonnie, Madi, and I took off on Friday morning and headed towards two of the most famous castles associated with King Ludwig II; Hohenschwangau and Neuschwanstein. The crowds were way smaller than they were in the Summer, but there were still tour buses parked all over and plenty of people flowing in and out of each castle. Our tour guide for Hohenschwangau was super and I learned some facts from her that I hadn't heard in my previous visits, but our second tour guide was awkward; and since I had visited both castles before, I had a bit of time to day dream and to listen between the lines...

This time while visiting the castles, I started to realize it was maybe a bit odd that Wagner (the famous pianist and composer) spent so much time at Hohenschwangau when Ludwig II was a small boy, only to become the one guest of Neuschwanstein and the motivation for every room in the enormous castle built by King Ludwig once he was older. As the day went on, Madi and I pieced together more and more evidence (the love of swans, the pristine decorating skills, the lack of a wife and kids....) that maybe King Ludwig the II was a bit....well.... fabulous! When we got to Unterammergau that evening, and had finished having fun and stuffing our faces at Gasthaus Stern down the street, Madi and I stayed up reading the only two books we could find in English in our Guest House. Although there were no books about Ludwig II (in English) there was a history of Bavaria and a history of Oberammergau. We didn't find too much interesting information on Ludwig, and instead focused our attention on the Passion Play of Oberammergau that takes place every ten years.

 Apparently, back during the plague, Oberammergau locked up the city and had sentries posted in an attempt to keep "the pest" from striking their city in the form of strangers coming and going. Unfortunately, a local man who had been traveling, managed to come into the village from a mountain passageway and then proceeded to die within two days. A huge number of villagers passed away from the plague within two weeks (I want to say the number was between 60 and 80) and so the people got together and made a promise to God that they would make sacrifices of time and money to honor and thank him for his graciousness for the rest of time, if only their city would be spared from more death. Interestingly enough, there were no more victims of the bubonic plague in their city, so every ten years, the town still gets together and puts on the Passion Play in the Passion Theatre (which has been rebuilt over time and now holds about 5,000 spectators). Unfortunately, the next play takes place in 2020, so we won't be able to watch it, but it was still fun to learn about!

Cody met up with us in Garmisch-Partenkirchen on Saturday morning and we spent the day walking through fields and hiking up a mountain in an attempt to go see the Partnach Gorge. We tired out before we got to the top, but not before we had a lovely lunch, took a terrifying cable car ride (damn cable cars!), and rode a horse-drawn carriage back down to the Olympic Stadium. After a quick stroll through the Christmas Market, we went home to rest up for the home-made dinner our Guest House owner had offered. We highly recommend staying with Marianne in Unterammergau if you are ever in the area- she was extremely friendly, helpful, and hospitable!

The next morning we got up and went to another one of Ludwig's castles; the only one he finished and one I had not heard of until this visit to the Alps! This castle, Linderhoff, was absolutely spectacular, inside and out. Dare I say it was even more fabulous than the ones we had toured before? As you can see, each room was covered in gold and velvet; there were even more swans, several peacocks (another of his favorite animals), and some rooms featured several pieces from his small porcelain vase collection... The tour guide at this castle/mansion (another wonderful and informative guide) even mentioned that Ludwig had called off his engagement mere months after it was arranged. The evidence had piled up; our dear, favorite King Ludwig just had to have been a homosexual!
I did manage to google this when I got home, and found some answers ! <p.s. we were right!>
While at the castle, we bought a book all about the reign of Ludwig and came to love him even more; and feel sympathy for how awful he was treated by the men who threw him out of office with manipulated paperwork and lies. (I encourage you to look up his story while bored at work!)

After leaving Linderhoff, we meandered to Ettal where we had another delicious German meal and spent some time at the King's Cloister, where we loaded up on liqueur, wine, gluwein, and beer. We played charades and enjoyed our goodies back at the Guest House and eventually went across the street to The Dorfwirt for dinner- even though we were there a bit late, the owners were stupendous and shared an after-dinner shot of schnapps with us, gave us some schnapps to take home, and even handed out postcards! As any trip should, this one ended with fun, food, and drinks- who knew the Alps could be so entertaining!?

What's Wrong with "Bulky"

I am so ashamed that I haven't updated this blog in a month!

So much has been happening, and I don't want to make any excuses, but I do want to let you know what I've been up to that has kept me from writing any posts.

 First, I am almost finished with my first two college classes since deciding to go back to school. Originally I went back to school with the goal of eventually becoming a Registered Dietician. So much about this goal beckons to me still, BUT the second time-consumer I have been distracted with has me wondering if I actually should get a second degree…
I have finally put my first degree to use and have been teaching FAST here on post for our wonderful Illesheim soldiers for the past three weeks. There is so much that I love about teaching adults, and through this opportunity I have been fortunate enough to be reminded of all the reasons I wanted to be a teacher in the first place. I hope that I made a positive change in my students' lives, because they certainly have made a positive change in mine!

Along with the job and school aspect of life, I have been Crossfitting in the evenings now because of my new work schedule; which pretty much makes for full days.
ALSO, I had an awesome visit from my first friend ever and we spent all of last weekend visiting Christmas markets (Nuremberg, Bad Windsheim, and Rothenberg), drinking gluwein, and catching up on about a billion years of lost time! The past month has been absolutely wonderful (minus the time that I was missing the hubs who was in the field training) and has also been a thought-provoking time for me.

Tonight's post is short, though I want to get more into this topic later...

When I started Crossfitting, I jumped on the bandwagon of telling my female friends who were interested in trying it, but scared or intimidated,
"Don't worry about getting huge, all the girls I work out with are super fit, but none of them look manly or anything."
I feel like this "encouragement" is almost built into the Crossfit culture. I see it in pretty much every article that I read about women doing Crossfit. I actually see it in almost every article I read about any kind of working out. And it used to make sense to me. I used to like that distinction.

But you know what I want to know?

What's so wrong with "bulky"?????

I have actually started to get kind of annoyed with all these assertions about how women should not be afraid to lift heavy weights because they won't bulk up. And this is why:

FORM FOLLOWS FUNCTION!!!

In brief summary: Our bodies have evolved to have the skeletal shape, organ systems, muscle fibers, etc. that we have today because this body design is the best structure (or form) for the functions that we do daily. In other words, no matter how you LOOK, you should be using your legs, arms, stomach, butt, heart, etc. for their intended purposes; eventually you will find functional translates into beautiful!

I want every part of my body to be the best at doing what nature intended it to do. Period. I want to be able to jump high, I want to be able to carry anything and everything, I want to be able to run as long and as fast as may be necessary. I want to squat, lift, hang, pull, push to my body's highest ability.

If I gain muscle and get "bulky" through this process, then AMEN! I love looking in the mirror and seeing more muscle than I could see six months ago. I revel in the ability to flex and see my biceps, delts, and traps. I feel strong and confident when my clothes fit tightly around my shoulders….

(If this is "bulky", please sign me up!)

To all you women out there- when you tap into your body's potential and begin to see the limitless possibilities for your strength, fitness, and overall health, you will not care if you are "bulky" vs "toned". All you will care about is that you are healthier and stronger than you were yesterday. And if you are anything like me, you are looking forward to the day that somebody (meant as either an insult or a compliment) says, 

"Damn, that girl is jacked!"

Hmmm... A Short Story on Perception...

Something funny happened today that made me think about how people see me differently than I see myself; and how people from this time in my life see me in a different light than people from earlier times of my life.

You see, I have been fighting off a cold for the past week and a half. When it first popped up, inconveniently in the middle of Halloween weekend, I tried to ignore it, and went ahead with my plans for drinking and staying up late. I took care of myself the best I could during the day, but I knew I wasn't helping my body with my bad sleep schedule and booze. I skipped my Monday Crossfit class while spending all day in pajamas and trying not to talk since my throat was killing me. By Tuesday, I decided that enough time had passed and I felt better enough to head back into the gym; I worked out Tuesday, Wednesday, and Friday. All week I felt pretty good! A little bit of a sniffle here or there, but its November, so a little bit of a runny nose is to be expected, right?

Wrong. Come Saturday I felt like I had not beaten my cold after all; the little bugger just snuck away for a few days to get some bigger and stronger friends to attack me worse than before! I didn't go to Cody's soccer party on Saturday night, and I spent most of Sunday feeling awful. By the time I went to bed on Sunday, my head felt like it was going to bust open. When I woke up in the middle of the night coughing so hard that I couldn't stop, with a throat that wouldn't stop itching, and a nose that wouldn't stop tingling and clogging, I knew I was in trouble...
Long story short, I have spent this week trying to beat off this cold with fresh squeezed orange juice, tea, sleep, and lots and lots of tissues. Oh, and Nyquil at night so my poor husband can get some rest! I have had to go out for certain responsibilities, but I have skipped the gym, and have let my eating habits slide. Anything my body wants, I give to it, for better or for worse. I haven't had the energy to care.

Moving on. I was upstairs visiting my neighbor today, talking to her about this lingering cold that I just can't beat, and she was telling me about how she has started running again. First of all, I am so excited for her that she has started to exercise again, because I know she has been wanting to, and I'm so glad that she found time to do something she enjoys! I let her know that I haven't been to Crossfit in five days, and because I am subbing tomorrow, still feel eh, and there is only open gym, that I'm going to be off tomorrow, too. She looked at me with real surprise on her face, and half sarcastically/half seriously said,

"I don't like this! It's not right. This just doesn't sound like you!"

I laughed and went on to tell her about my disgusting diet these past few days, as well... like on Monday where all I ate was an overly sweet and box-made mini-cheesecake on top of a Reese's cup, two chocolate chip cookies, and two eggs all day. And then I totally made "tuna mac" (a gross concoction of Kraft Mac&Cheese, a can of tuna, a can of peas, and crumbled crackers) for dinner and ate too much; which led to a feeling kind of like my body was trying to kick my stomach out of me for being so full of grossness.

The point of my story is this: At first, I just laughed about my neighbor being so shocked about me not working out. And her similar reaction to how I have been eating (especially since she just asked for and received advice from me about Paleo/Primal a couple weeks ago). Afterwards, once the conversation had passed and started to sink in, I thought, It is pretty cool that Crossfit and Primal have become such a big part of my life, that my friends here can't picture me without them. 

At one point in my life, probably about a year ago, nobody would have been surprised if I would have said, "Yea, I haven't worked out in 6 days," or, "Ugh, I ate a cheesecake for breakfast and tuna mac for lunch." That would have just been a normal conversation.

It is so crazy how much we can change in such a short amount of time. It is also crazy to realize how certain things we may know nothing about today could become engrained in our lives tomorrow. I am so thankful that Crossfit and overall health have become a part of my life, and apparently have become a part of me. So much so that I can take a week off, and feel confident that I will go right back to where I was before; there is no part of me that wants to continue this break forever.

The coolest part of this story is that I think it is important to take a step back and see ourselves as others see us, not the "haters" and strangers, but those people who actually know us. I think other people see us way better than we see ourselves, what with all of our self-perception and self-confidence issues running amuck. If you have a chance to see yourself as others see you, take it, so you can learn to appreciate who you have grown into, not just who you used to be.

For a really great article on self-confidence and awareness, check out my friend's recent blog post at CrossfitterMama!